Funny one liners.

• Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
• Better to understand a little than to misunderstand a lot.
• Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
• I poured Spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone.
• I get enough exercise just pushing my luck.
• I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
• If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
• Multitasking means screwing up several things at once.
• On the other hand, you have different fingers.
• Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
• The Energizer Bunny was arrested and charged with battery.
• There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count and those who can't.
• We have enough youth, how about a fountain of smart?
• When there's a will, I want to be in it.
• I live in my own little world, but it's okay because they know me there.